An entry, a holiday

Feeling overwhelmed. Good changes coming but not on their own. Am wondeirng what makes me fill every moment to the point of distraction and think I know. Drugs are too much trouble and also not very healthy which begs the question which kind of health what is health. Charcoal grill scented air is a like a prayer to summer and I am at the moment feeling religious. A river running near a back yard. A simplicity. A not always scheduled. A quiet. But a knowing too a lonely a bored an understimulated but yards and yards of pages bookshelves walls. Hey I have a class planned to teach myself. I do not want to talk but desire conversation. This is a little entry. It resists comfort. Don't be moved manipulated tempted to answer. Nobody here.